Because I Love To Torture My Brother
by Tinkering
Summary: Itachi isn't the world's best brother. But Sasuke needs a little love in his life so Itachi gets him a pet. Usually this would be one of the nicest things he's ever done for his brother but when things start getting crazy and the fox isn't just a fox...
1. Prologue

**Disclaimer:**_I own nothing. Sue me for nothing._

**A/N:** This is my newest pet. My favourite baby. #hides the ears of Bleach and Gundam Wing fics# I was inspired by…oh hell, I'm not going to attempt to butcher her name. That'd be blasphemy. She wrote The Demilitarized Zone. If you haven't read, go to after this.

_My Itachi is a poor imitation of hers. But I love mine too. I usually love most Itachis I come across. Itachi is just so damned lovable!_

**Because I Love –To Torture- My Brother**

Prologue

He had already been in the city for two days, filching food from garbage bins and getting carelessly discarded scraps. Now the small form of auburn melding into crimson slunk down the alley as he headed towards where he sensed other animals.

Not quite like him. None were quite like him but they'd be good enough company. He sniffed delicately around the doorway of what he thought was a pound and finally sat before the door, cocking his head at it. Perhaps...he might have better luck getting in...

Three minutes later, he was on the other side of the door, dainty fox paws trotting him down the hallway. He would hide out in the back with the animal cages and make some friends before he moved on in the morning.

Little did he know his need for companionship for the night would change his life forever.

* * *

"What would possess you to believe I wanted a pet?" Sasuke Uchiha asked, voice acidic as he glared at his older brother.

"Well otouto, I was hoping some companionship might make you nicer but obviously I only succeeded in torturing the poor animal." His brother Itachi shook his head, unapologetic even as he lifted the large cage that had the small chinchilla inside, pale gray eyes darting from left to right as the creature huddled against the opposite side to Itachi's peering face. "I hope they let me return it. And it is such an expensive pet too. Hybrid chinchillas are not easy to find."

"Well no one told you to go waste your money on such a frivolous thing. To make matters worse Sakura was constantly complaining about how 'the rodent' must be contaminating our room –from in a cage mind you!- …and it was only here _one_ night! She won't accept pets."

Itachi snorted, an amused smirk tugging at his lips. "As if she even sleeps in there." Shrugging and making a put-upon face, Itachi headed to the door. "It's too bad I guess. Little Hinata-sama will just have to go back to the pet shop. Pity, I did rather hope you'd like her…"A knowing leer took over his face. "After all she has eyes like Neji Hyuuga."

Sasuke's back stiffened suddenly and he bristled, anger making his voice tight. "Get out and take the animal with you."

"Sayonara otouto." Itachi lifted a hand to wave carelessly but the door had already been slammed behind him.

* * *

His little brother needed a little love in his life…even if it was from some overgrown dog or lower form of being. After all he was already married to the lowest form of being there was. Giving him a pet should be an improvement.

Itachi had never approved of his brother marrying that Sakura Haruno…but their father had been unrelenting in his praises of her family. And as Itachi was the heir to his business and therefore unable to be involved in such an arduous process as courting some woman and marrying her to father children, Sasuke took care of that area.

Sasuke for his part hadn't fought. Much. He had been married to her for four months now but that didn't change the fact he was gay. He continued his usual way of life…as long as their father didn't peer to closely into his personal business he would do as asked. After all, he felt he had to live up to Itachi.

He blamed their father for the way they both were. Itachi was cynical, cold and often cruel, not to mention he took ultimate pleasure in his brother's double life but as much of as bastard as he was to Sasuke he did somewhere, deep, deep, deep down care about the little bugger.

Hence, a pet. If anyone needed something fluffy and warm to tend to, it was Sasuke. He was already too far gone. If someone gave him a pet…well he could already imagine what he'd do to it. Dye it interesting colors…dunk it in water purposely if it was a water-hating animal…scare it constantly with its most disliked fear…and probably find the whole thing amusing. Yes, he was not a person to give a pet too.

'Though,' Itachi thought as he pushed open the door to the pet shop, 'The pets in here are so rare and spectacular if I could find something interesting enough I might be interested…just to see what a platinum blonde liger would look like."

"Ah? Can I help…? Is that Hinata-sama?" So the clerk recognized the chinchilla. "Oh my God! Why is she back? Is something _wrong_?" His voice raised irritatingly on the last word and Itachi cut him off with a raised hand.

"The chinchilla is fine. I simply wish to return it. It didn't go down well with the recipient." Itachi held out the cage to the man and watched as he sighed, relived, and took the cage from him delicately.

"I'm almost happy to see her back. She is so very rare our Hinata-sama…I'd prefer even to breed her first but…" The random man shook his head. "Anyway, did you wish to find something else or just the refund?"

That was the dilemma. If he showed up on Sasuke's doorstep with another pet he'd probably not let him in. Yet…a dumb dog would warm Sasuke's bed better than his cold-fish wife.

"Show me what you have in the bigger pet variety." Maybe Sasuke would like something that could stand up for itself better than a little chinchilla.

"Very good sir. Just hold one moment while I put Hin-hime away and I'll guide you to the large cage area. The man bowed shortly scurrying away with the cage.

Itachi looked around the store half-interested as he waited. Perhaps he could find his brother a cute,not so little,pet to make his life a little better in the mornings.

* * *

A/N: Play nice! Feed the review puppy. Be truthful though. Tell me what you think. Tell me something! And to do that...#points down# Not the ads! The review button! 


	2. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:**_I own nothing. Sue me for nothing._

A/N: I'm so excited over this one that I've posted another chapter so soon! I want to see more interest. More hits and more reviews! Let me know what you're thinking people!

**Because I Love –To Torture- My Brother**

**Chapter One**

The little foxed yawned slowly showing off small, pinprick sharp fangs as it stretched slowly, before resettling back next to the caged, large white dog he was sleeping with.

He had spent the night huddled there, the dog pressing against him through the small squares in the cage as they slept together. For some reason the dog had taken a liking to him so he had stayed next to it. But though he was still tired he'd have to move soon and get out. If he wasn't careful one of the noisy humans he heard bustling around outside might come in the back and find him.

Not that he couldn't escape if that happened but still…A low snuffle and a wet nose pushed into his side woke him what only seemed like a few minutes later and he was about to swat the overly playful dog on the nose when he heard footsteps.

"We have all sort in the large room, but of course we group by species. We have normal dogs, hybrid dogs, large cats of the more rare type you know, the newest in miniature cows, hybrid pigs, deer, a few large predator birds…" 

'Oh…crap.' He stood up suddenly, bristling against the dog's cage as long legs turned the corner and stopped suddenly before him.

"Ah, do you also have foxes?" His carmine eyes flashing he set his paws apart and bristled threateningly letting out a low, almost purring growl. 

"We do in the other area but we don't often get requests for normal foxes…we are after all a mostly hybrid store. Why do you ask?"

He had used his time to look over his seeker, a tall human with dark eyes and equally dark long hair as he stared down at him, amused the fox could tell, by the smirk on his lips.

"Well, you have a loose fox here and he doesn't look happy." No kidding. The fox took a step back and hit into the dog's cage again. He should just run for it. It had been fun to stay for a night with other animals but he had been discovered; it was obviously time to leave.

"Loose!" The crimson coat flashed by as the fox took that exclamation as his starter's gun and bolted. And boy could he run. But he neglected to remember one thing…the door. The only reason he'd got in was because of his skill but he obviously couldn't use it now to get back out…

Skidding to a halt and turning tail to the door out he growled threateningly as the tall, pale human was the first to catch up.

'I'm not going without a fight and by God you better believe I'll win!' The fox flattened his ears and bared his teeth in warning as the human stepped closer and bent down.

"Hey little fox…how about we play nice and you let the nice man put you back in your cage?" He almost paused at the calm, soothing voice but did not let himself relax. He had the voice of a whisperer, soft, persuasive, charming. But hybrid foxes were not easily charmed. Especially hybrids of higher intelligence.

Carmine eyes narrowed to slits as the human lifted a pale hand to grab him. 'Now or never. All or nothing. Believe it! I'm getting out of here.' And with a high yelp he jumped and latched his teeth into the offered hand.

* * *

"AH! Fu-UHG! Damn-!" Itachi winced but didn't try to shake it off. He did the smarter thing and grabbed the fox with his other hand, tucking it into a lock under his arm. The fox obviously did not expect this as he released its bite and immediately started trying to wriggle out of his hold but his other hand released only gave him a tighter grip.

"Gotcha little fox." He smirked even as he wanted to wince at the spasms of pain wracking his hand. But he continued holding on and walked to the back rooms where he caught the shop keeper looking around dazedly at cages.

It was rather a spirited little thing. And cute too with its fluffy red tail and flat, wide swiveling little red ears. In fact, he looked the small dog sized fox over. It was all perfectly an unmarred burnt-red. Awfully intelligent eyes were staring up at him, sizing him up as they walked and Itachi found himself looking back into the fox's eyes…found adequate when it finally stopped struggling and took to _frowning_ at the passing cages. 

'A frowning fox.' Itachi thought with a laugh. And yet, there was a little furrow of folded skin between the two red eyes. Yup, the fox was frowning. Probably plotting a way to escape…

"What is the problem?" The man was still scratching his head and walking up and down.

"There aren't any empty cages…I don't understand…"The shopkeeper looked to the fox in Itachi's arms and back to the cages. "He looks like one of ours, a hybrid…fabulous care, great coat, even albino type eyes…but…"

"This isn't one of your foxes?" The man hesitated before shaking his head. Then he saw his prospective customer's hand.

"Definitely not our fox!" He stated firmly. "We don't have violently animals here."

'You mean you don't have spunky animals here.' Itachi looked around. 'Even your beloved Hinata-sama was too easy for my brother to break. They're all so timid save a few. This one definitely isn't yours.'

The small red fox was looking up at him again, eyes wide and assessing. Itachi made up his mind with one more look. The fox might be interesting in blue…

"I'll take it. I'll even reimburse you a small amount since I found it here. And you need not worry about prosecution for the bite." The man blanched and Itachi smiled cuttingly. "After all it's not your fox right?"

"R-right!"

"So let's deal."

* * *

A/N: I hope more people get interested...Dattebayo!

Ja ne! 


	3. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:**_I own nothing. Sue me for nothing._

A/N: #hops around from foot to foot# Read and review and I'll love you!

**Because I Love –To Torture- My Brother **

**Chapter Two**

What was his brother thinking? That he could just take liberties in his life and dump some animal on his doorstep for him.

Sasuke didn't understand why his brother would feel the need to bestow him a pet at the ripe age of twenty-three. He wasn't a petulant twelve year old anymore, begging for a dog. In fact he took high offense to his brother's _pity_.

Because he knew that was the only reason Itachi could be doing this besides to annoy him. How dare he look down on his situation!? He was perfectly fine where he was. He had the Uchiha family name and monetary backing supporting him, even though he often took umbrage when someone suggested he was abusing it. He had a wife and soon hopefully a child or children, even if he despised the woman and abhorred the twice-monthly attempts at conceiving. Sasuke actually had a job he enjoyed though.

Perhaps his job was the only thing keeping him sane. The only stable in his life besides daily misery. Going to the studio to create a new masterpiece at least once a week was his only passion in life.

The only one he could expose that is. Sasuke scowled, stomping down the stairs to his basement. He had mentioned Neji…Sasuke clenched his fists and started ripping cloth off the covered pieces in the room. No, not Neji, Hyuuga. Neji was dead to him. Sasuke was married now. But how dare his brother remind him what he had lost!? Itachi got to have the life Sasuke could have had if he had been first born. Yes, he worked for Father but at least he wasn't tied down to a cold-hearted bitch and obligated to…say, 'mate with a bird while he'd rather be bumping another bee'. Sure, he wouldn't have his art…but –Lord help him if he'd so eagerly sell his soul to the devil-, he'd rather give up art than be married to Sakura. But it was all so their father could have his precious perfect family with all of _his_ dreams fulfilled.

Door locked, Sasuke used the remote to turn on the stereo and raise the volume on his music. The sound of screaming violins filled the basement as Sasuke shucked his polo shirt and slacks for a T-shirt and paint spattered jeans. Itachi mattered not. His brother's stupid plans were below him. Itachi would know better than to bring another animal here. After all he needed no company. His art had become _everything_.

* * *

"Come on Kitten. Get off the bookshelf."

Kitten. That damned human had taken to calling him Kitten. He wasn't a damned kit, he was full grown fox dammit.

And to make matters worse…! The electric blue fox hissed down from the top of the bookshelf he was plastered against. His fur was still wet from his impromptu makeover.

"Oh come on. It was all in good fun."

It had all been in good fun…when the first day after he'd been taken from the pet store he'd been carted around in a tote bag. That was…demeaning, but acceptable.

It had all been in good fun when two days later he woke up with a rhinestone tag around his neck reading 'Kitten'. He'd not accepted that so easily but now the human's hands matched each other.

It had all been in good fun when five days after being taken in by this human he was suddenly and violently treated to his first 'bath', where the idiot finally realized he was male but refused to change his name on account of it 'suiting' him. He had even not retaliated from that bath seeing as he had been dirty and once he got over the shock he didn't mind the water and being washed was rather like a massage…

But he should have known…He bared his fangs at the dark-haired, dark-eyed demon smirking up at him patiently. He should have known something was up when a mere three days later the human declared he needed another bath. He acquiesced because he was after all an animal and did get dirty and he nightly commandeered the foot of the man's bed so a bath every three days wasn't so much to ask of him.

The psycho had 'shampooed' him with hair color! And dyed him blue! His only reprise was in that the dye was temporary, lasting only about three days.

But this was it. The final straw. Like Hell he was staying with this guy.

"Ah…Kitten, good thing you can stand up to me." What was the stupid human going on about now? "You need to be tough for where I'm taking you…that bitch will be bad enough but…especially if he sees you as a pity gift from me…he'll be worse…"

The still wet and outraged form on the bookshelf bristled. 'Gift!?' He wasn't anyone's _gift_! And he was escaping, definitely not going anywhere this psycho was taking him.

"Sasuke needs a fiery pet like you. Maybe he'll learn from you and regain his fire too." The pale psycho had sat himself in an armchair, not even looking at him anymore as pondered aloud. "What he needs more than a docile pet is companionship. And you'll give him that won't you Kitten?"

'No…definitely not! Because I am _not_ staying!' The fox tensed again, he had _not_ relaxed listening to the psycho, definitely not!

"You're amazingly intelligent for a fox." Those dark eyes pierced him, almost analytically. "It must be because you're a hybrid…but sometimes I think you can almost understand me…" Licking down his _blue_ coat, the fox let out a loud snuff.

'I don't understand you psycho. I don't speak 'crazy'.' The fox looked with slit eyes at the human in the chair. 'And you obviously don't understand either. My name's not Kitten, I'm not a bloody pet and I'm definitely not going to be a gift to one of your psycho friends!'

"Kitten, if you can understand me…and I don't know, I think you can…" The human stood and slowly made his way to stand before the bookshelf, head raised up to look the fox in the eye. "My brother needs a friend. He won't accept human friendship, maybe he'll accept a fox." Black eyes met carmine. "Will you help me?" 

The fox huffed and puffed, blowing himself into a large, electric blue 'fire'-ball. He should scratch this bugger in his face…tell him to go jump…simply stay up here and escape in the night…

He groomed his tail slowly and then looked down on the psycho appraisingly. The psycho wasn't _such_ a psycho. He actually cared about someone. And the psycho's brother…Sasuke, was in trouble somehow. Cursing his instincts for telling him this was the _right_ thing to do…Naruto prepared and jumped down into waiting arms before giving a warning growl.

He'd stay but Lord help the psycho if he tried anything else before he got taken to the brother he was to help. Or psycho wouldn't have so handsome a visage anymore.

* * *

A/N: #claps hands together# Yay! Now...#points down# And I want comments, queries, questions! Not just..."Cool. Update soon."

Though I'll take those too. if the 'cool' has a '!' after it. #grins#


	4. Chapter 3

A/N: Well, for those who were waiting for Sasuke and Naruto to meet…here it is!

**Disclaimer:** #**burp#** I'm eating cheetos and drinking stale milk. You think I own this!?

**Because I Love –To Torture- My Brother**

**Chapter Two**

Almost two weeks after he'd last seen his brother, Sasuke opened his front door to find him standing there, face blank.

"What do you want." Sasuke asked darkly, frowning. Then he noticed the fox sitting calmly next to his brother. And glared back up. "You didn't…"

"Sasuke meet Kitten. Kitten meet Sasuke, my brother who you will be staying with." Itachi gestured to the doorway and Sasuke watched with wide eyes as the fox stood and trotted in between him and the door.

"What the…BLOODY HELL ITACHI! Go get your damned fox out of my house!" Sasuke turned from the door and held it open for his brother…who wasn't coming in.

"Actually I have a meeting to go to. Oh, before I forget." A large garbage bag was suddenly stuffed into his arms. "Blanket, two bowls, a large throw pillow, a toy, small bag of dog chow I got Kitten to eat. He's quite intelligent and I find as long as you respect him he'll respect you. I'll leave Kitten to take care of you now. Bye otouto!" And with that he was walking back down the driveway to his car and before Sasuke could splutter twice he was gone.

"What…what the…" Sasuke stared after the disappearing car rounding the corner of his street before turning around.

The fox was sitting in the middle of the hallway. Staring at him. It was disconcerting actually, especially after Itachi spoke as if it were…well, intelligent.

"Stop staring at me you stupid animal! And when my brother gets back home I'm going to kill him!" Sasuke burst out. Apparently that was all the fox needed as it calmly turned tail and started trotting up the stairs.

"Shit. No, no, no don't go up there." He dropped the garbage bag and started rustling through it desperately. Toy, toy, toy…where was the…

"Umm…Kitten! Kitten look I've got your toy!" Sasuke waved around the ugly green stuffed frog just as the fox hit the top of the stairs. Sakura would flip if she saw a fox in their house. It _couldn't_…be seen!

Baring fangs in what looked eerily like a grin, the fox ignored him again and walked out of sight.

"Shit."

"SASUKEEEEEEE!" Double shit.

Sasuke hopped up the stairs quickly, taking them in twos. He walked quickly down the hallway to Sakura's studio and found his wife standing on the barstool-type chair in front of her audio area. Itachi's fox was actually shrinking back from the doorway of the room, wide ears flat on its head as it stared reproachfully at Sakura, who was still shrieking.

"SASUKE! GET THAT ANIMAL OUT OF HERE!! MY _GOD_! From a chinchilla to a fox! Next you'll want to bring home an elephant!" The pink-haired (Yes pink, his wife was a pop singer) woman pointed shakily to the door.

Kitten turned carmine eyes on him with an outrageous look on its face like 'What the hell!?' Sasuke had never seen an animal so expressive. It would be funny if Sakura's high-pitched shrieks weren't driving him to distraction.

"Come on Kitten." He still had the green frog clutched in his hand and he waved it at the fox half-heartedly.

The fox backed out of the doorway with a low huff and trotted smoothly past Sasuke, grabbing the frog on his way by. Sasuke watched the red tail go down the stairs and round the corner to the kitchen.

"Are you just going to let it freely roam our house!? Sasuke! That…that thing…probably has fleas or something!" Sakura got down finally, resting her hands on her equipment as she seemed weak-kneed.

"It's Itachi's fox. It's name is Kitten and he…just sort of left it with me for the day or two. I think he said he had a meeting. He's probably going overseas somewhere so he just…"

"Your brother can't just take advantage of us like that! It's bad enough he drops small _rats_ off here because for some reason he thinks you need a pet…but to leave his own overgrown vermin here…" Sakura turned to look at him finally, green eyes disapproving. "Really Sasuke. You've got to grow a backbone to him and say no."

Sasuke clenched his pale hands tightly and was about to retort when he heard yipping downstairs. "Shit."

Sakura's eyes widened in fear. "Oh my God, suppose he's down their destroying something of mine? My CD collection is downstairs…!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes and left the room. "Just keep your door shut for a few days while you're working until I can give it back to Itachi. I assume it's housetrained so we won't have to worry about that and it won't bother you if you don't bother it."

"But Sas-" He shut the door firmly and quickly walked back down the hall, frowning. 'Dammit. His brother was determined to make his life living Hell.

He fairly bounded down the stairs, holding onto the handrail and then strode quickly down the hall. Where had that fox sounded like it was…he paused and then stopped walking. In fact where was the bag he'd left by the door?

He walked warily into the kitchen…to find the fox headfirst in the bag. A spark of the evilness that probably defined Itachi dared him to stuff the fox in the bag and dump it but he held himself. Sasuke then watched in awe as the fox pulled one and then the other of its bowls out of the bag and pushed and prodded them with his nose until they were both against the wall. It burrowed back into the bag and dragged the dog chow Itachi had left for it aside before going back in. Pillow and blanket were both tugged out in a fluffy mouthful as the fox dragged its sleep gear backwards into the den.

"What the hell…" The fox continued setting up house, locating his bed in front of the television and then leaving and reappearing with the ugly frog it dropped next to the 'bed'. It seemed to frown around the room before spotting its target.

Before Sasuke could move it was jumping onto the coffee table, lifting the remote in its mouth and jumping off again. If it bloody chewed up the remote…!

"Hey! Watch it, that thing's expen…" Flip. Cartoons. Flip. Discovery Kids. There was a pause. Flip. More cartoons. Flip. Home improvement channel. Flip. Cooking station. Lifting it's paw off the remote and shunting it aside, Kitten climbed onto its pillow, jumped on it a bit and then settled into the hollow, curling its tail around it's body, eyes on the TV.

"Bloody fuck." Itachi hadn't been lying when he'd said it was intelligent. Had he taught the fox to do _that_? Surely he had! No animal was that smart. Sasuke raked a hand through his hair. Well, if he followed Itachi's instructions and just…'respected' Kitten, they should be fine co-existing for a few days. Until he could give it back to his brother with 'strong' instruction to quit it.

Sasuke backed away slowly, leaving Kitten to watch TV. He actually cringed every time he said that name, even in his head. What the Hell kind of name was Kitten and why had his brother named the fox that? Geez, it might have been better naming the poor thing Reddy or something equally inane.

Shaking his head, Sasuke turned and headed for his studio. Sakura would do her work for the day, he would do his, Kitten would watch TV…like a happy family. The door shut and Sasuke got to work, soon forgetting about his new charge.

* * *

A/N: Hope you enjoy! I welcome all comments. I want to hear _everything_! So please, review.


	5. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** …you think my broke ass owns this?

**Because I Love –To Torture- My Brother**

**Chapter Four**

God he was hungry. After four hours of watching the cooking channel, Naruto might even go in for some of that horrid dog chow the psycho had got him. Getting up and stretching his lithe body, the fox trotted over to where he had set up his bowls…to find them both empty.

'You've got to be kidding me! Bastard couldn't even put some water and food out!?'

Mind, he knew he'd shocked the bastard with his skills –Naruto wanted to fluff his tail at that- but geez! He was tempted to just take care of everything himself but then…what would be the point of coming here? If he behaved it would be just like keeping a nice, docile little house pet for a few days. Psycho had asked him to make his brother fiery again. And that, he would.

Using his 'super'-skill for a second Naruto opened the door went in and shut it before looking down into the basement. Well, onward to his quest.

Walking carefully down the stairs, they were kind of steep, Naruto turned the corner to the floor level and stopped in surprise.

The bastard had skills. The canvases around him were filled with magnificent murals, still-life, water colors, chalks and inks…all bursting with color and emotion. Walking around the room against the wall and avoiding the swaying, seemingly-entranced, painting person in the middle of the room who seemed to be finishing off his current canvas to loud, ear piercing music, Naruto examined the pieces he could get close to without showing himself.

A mural of color, more angry slashes and hesitant spots of color than an actual picture. A couple of still-life pieces, a broken bottle, the usual bowl of fruit but with them rotten. Chalks and inks of people Naruto had met and hadn't met from his life, Psycho, Bastard's Pink-Alarm and a couple of ramrod straight people he could assume to be his parents…

But then there was the watercolor shoved into the corner, still half covered. Naruto looked to Sasuke-bastard before using his teeth to tug down the canvas cloth gently.

It was…no, _he_ was beautiful. Naruto sat on his haunches, tail wrapped close and looked from the picture to the bastard in the middle of the room. So this was who Sasuke loved. Even if he lived with and was married to Pink-Alarm who Psycho didn't like…her picture looked nothing like this. Had none of the emotion in every stroke…

He'd even done the unbelievably pale blue eyes of the man he'd painted to absolute perfection, showing an intelligent, slightly amused man behind the eyes. The unknown man was sitting at a table over books and had apparently looked away…to the watcher. He'd assume that was Sasuke and that the bastard had done this from memory. If so it was even more telling…

Naruto let out a soft huffing, wondering how he was going to do this. Bastard was married. But his brother wanted him happy and…well, looking at this picture Naruto could guess this man made him happy.

This would require his skill. But if he could find out who this man was, get him to talk to Sasuke…maybe even get them back together! –but that was thinking a bit big- then Psycho and Bastard would both be happy and he could trot off into the sunse-

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN HERE!?"

'Holy SHIT!' Naruto almost jumped a mile high at the scream over the music and turned shocked eyes to where the pale, dark-haired man was stalking towards him. 'Oh hell.' The fox backed away from the canvas, getting ready to bolt.

"You stupid fox. This is my work! Suppose you'd…" The irate voice trailed off as Sasuke-bastard realized what he had been examining so closely. Naruto crouched, looking from man to picture and watching his expression.

Pain. Still pained, even only looking at a drawing. Then a disconsolation and a sort of longing crossed his face before it went blank again. Right, well that decided it…he'd have to find…

"Why'd you…" Sasuke's voice was soft, deceptively calm. "What's so special about this picture fox? You come down here skulking around…I was about to yell at you for maybe damaging one of my pictures…and you're looking at the only one not for sale…You're too intelligent. What are you? Stupid fox…" Sasuke seemed to be rambling, depression making him as morose as his rhetorical questions.

Naruto sat up, yipped and turned tail for the door.

"I'm sure I closed the door." Sasuke followed him up the stairs and yes indeed the door was shut. Sasuke only frowned before opening it and Naruto stepped halfway out before looking back at him, staring really.

"What?" The fox yipped again before moving on. He felt stupid guiding the bastard like some mis-bred Lassie but he eventually got him to the bowls.

"Oh." Sasuke blinked down at the empty bowls. "You were hungry."

Naruto yipped again, higher. 'Finally bastard. Now give me some _food_!'

Then the bastard reached for the dog chow. Naruto groaned, rolled over and kicked his legs up. 'Kill me now.'

Sasuke looked at him in shock, well as shocked as he'd let himself look. His eyebrows were raised slightly. "What? Itachi said you'd eat this."

'_Itachi_ is a psycho.' Naruto rolled back over and glared slit-eyed at his keeper. Sasuke frowned then.

"So what do you eat then? I don't know what foxes eat!" Sasuke walked over to the fridge and opened it. "Meat? We've got…chicken salad and salmon filet and some tuna melt…"

Naruto sat and wrinkled his nose in thought. The salmon sounded safest. He turned eyes to Sasuke and yipped twice.

"…Uh. Meat then?" Naruto rolled his eyes. God, bastard was slow too? Itachi had worked out the talk and yip system on his first try. The fox nodded and Sasuke's eyes widened. "Okay!"

"Chicken?" The red head shook. "Salmon?" The fox sighed and nodded wearily before giving him a bereaved look. "I am _not_ stupid!" Naruto's lips twisted into the closest thing he could give to a smirk. 'Says the man talking to a fox he calls stupid, yet said fox is smarter than him.'

As he warmed up a salmon cut in the microwave, Sasuke watched him intently. Naruto turned carmine eyes back on him, cocking his head to the side.

"You're too smart for a normal fox. You're another hybrid Itachi got aren't you?" Naruto repeated his bereaved look from before and the bastard glared. "Well then, you know I don't really want a pet from my behavior. If we just get along for a few days I can give you back to Itachi when he comes back and we'll all be happy."

Naruto sighed in a whiny way and turned his attention back to the microwave. 'If only it were so simple Sasuke-bastard!'

* * *

A/N: Umm, it's good to feel like an idiot once in a while if it's all in good fun...

Hence, here's my favourite joke off all time. You get to answer it.

"How do you catch a squirrell?"


	6. Chapter 5

A/N: Itachi-sama is my Lord. But L is my God. #has perched on her chair, will buy a flip cell phone for no good reason but to hurt wrist holding it and has decided to hold things as if they are diseased# Typing one handed is slow though...and I can't eat sweets like he does...#frowns#

Yes I have a new obsession.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto…or anything, pretty much.

**Because I Love –To Torture- My Brother**

**Chapter Five**

Itachi sighed loudly, melodramatic. Home was such a lonely place without Kitten. No bright red eyes rolling at him, no hissing from atop the bookcase, no claws taking swipes at his face. Also no warm feet at night and almost affectionate headbutts on the way by…

But Sasuke needed Kitten. Way more than he did.

Itachi just had this _feeling_ that Kitten was just what Sasuke needed. It was like Fate had dropped the fox in that store for him to find. The intelligent, fire-red fox would get Sasuke back to the brother he knew and irritated. Instead of this one who just took it with a scowl and empty threats.

Not that he missed the yelling, screaming, indignant thing he'd had for a brother while Sasuke had been dating Neji. But at least then he'd also caught flashes of what they both could have been. Happy, outrageously happy if some of the occasions he'd seen them out together spoke true, content with life, even if only a painter and even more content with home. A place just for him and his lover…

Kitten would fix it. Itachi nodded to himself as he sipped a scotch, undoing his tie for the day. He just had to lie low for a while. Maybe _really_ get an out of town meeting and just leave Kitten a week or two to work his magic.

Mah, he just hoped Sasuke didn't work up the balls to call the company and ask where Itachi was. He wouldn't usually risk it for fear news of his call reaching it back to their Father and the resulting questions of why he hadn't stopped to talk to him or if there had been any luck in his and Sakura's conception yet. But if Sasuke got fed up enough with Kitten's being at his house…he might call.

Itachi put down his tumbler and threw his head back with a groan. It was so hard being noble.

* * *

The next morning Sasuke woke to something warm and heavy lying over his feet. He groaned in his sleep and tried to shift but the…_thing_ wouldn't move. So he kicked it.

A loud yelp followed by a thump of something hitting the floor roused him and Sasuke sat up, duck-butt hairstyle rumpled around his head as he looked around blearily.

"What?" Had he dropped something? He blinked, once, twice and rubbed his eyes irritated. What the hell had just woken him up?

The fox picked then to jump back on the bed and bristled indignantly at him.

"You?" Sasuke squinted…then his brain caught up. "What the fuck were you doing in my bed!? No animals in the bed!"

Kitten jumped back down, presented _his_ –the fox was a he- butt to him and stretched his body out long, claws scratching the floor.

"Hey! Do you pay for the buffing here?" The fox gave him the equivalent to a raised eyebrow, a look that practically shouted 'Do I care?' before huffing and trotting to his door.

Sasuke looked at the closed door again, confused. He'd shut his door after he'd come in…the door was still shut. How had the fox got in??

"I think I have to change your name to Houdini. Did you do this with Itachi too or are you just fucking with my head?" Sasuke rubbed his hair dazedly.

"Sasuke who are you talking to?" The fox hopped out of the way as the door opened. "What are you do-_EEEK!!_" Sakura scrambled over to the bed and climbed onto it. "What is _that_ THING doing in here!?"

Sasuke deadpanned. "It slept in here. Right where you're crouching as a matter of fact." The fox blinked as him as Sakura gaped and bared its fangs in a foxy grin as she bolted from the bed for the master bathroom and shut herself in.

"Get it out." Came through the door, muffled.

"Sakura stop being immature. The fox is obviously well trained. It's not going to attack you." Sasuke rolled his eyes as the fox lay down just next to the doorway to watch this conversation.

"But it's dirty. It's surely smelly. And it's…it's an _animal_!" Sasuke gave the bathroom door a look of incredulity.

"Are you a germophobe?"

"…" Well, that answered that. Sasuke frowned. "Seriously, I'm not talking to you through a door Sakura. Come on, Kitten's well trained. You avoid him he'll avoid you. Hell, he spent the most of yesterday in front of the TV. Itachi's trained him to be a couch potato."

The fox…he really was going to have to change that name…yipped indignantly.

The door opened hesitantly. "Can't you…put it outside? Tie it up or something…"

"Yeah. All we need is for the neighbours to report us for animal cruelty…" Sasuke stood from the bed with a disapproving frown. "Look. You know what? I'll just take it downstairs with me now. It wants to get out anyway. You come out when you're ready."

"I-I just don't want it near me…" Sakura's green eyes peeked around the door. And met the carmine eyes of the _grinning_ fox sitting in front of the door. "AAACK!" And the door was slammed again.

Sasuke blinked. "I'm sure that wasn't nice." The fox yipped, fanged-laugh still on its face and turned to the door again, pawing at it. "You're definitely Itachi's…" He stood and headed to the door with the fox. "But why in God's name did he name you Kitten…?"

* * *

A/N: Again, only one person answered correctly! Star Eyed Unicorn! And thank you for your jokes too! Loved the robbers on the 13th floor. Pay Backs a Bitch, a cookie for…err, true, ah…creativity.

Ano sa...ehh...What did the tablecloth say to the table?


	7. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto…or anything, pretty much.

A/N: Apparently that last one was toooo easy! Cookie for Blue Tygr, who got it perfectly right! Star Eyed Unicorn had basically the same answer, different words so you get a cookie too and Pay Back…have a glass of grape juice. #grins#

**Because I Love –To Torture- My Brother**

**Chapter Five**

Naruto yawned widely, watching the bastard pick his breakfast. He might leave a bit of chow out for him between meals but there was no way in hell Naruto was going to eat that crap all day.

"If I give you all the salmon Sakura's going to be pissed. If you're not going to eat that chow I need to go shopping." Sasuke muttered as he walked from the fridge holding the salmon slabs and plopped them down on the kitchen counter. "What the hell do you eat anyway?"

'Meat stupid. More rarer, more better.' Naruto made a point of hopping up onto one of the kitchen chairs so he could watch Sasuke at a higher level. 'Fruit too maybe. And I can lower myself to a mouse or two but…the other side of me _reallly_ hates doing that.' The small face blanched.

Sasuke caught the look of disgust and took it for instruction. He paused in his walk to the oven and hefted the thin cut of salmon. "_Don't_ cook it?"

Naruto nodded, his head to the side.

"Alright. That makes it easier for me." The slab was deposited in his bowl then and Naruto ignored Sasuke for the next ten minutes as he ate.

After licking his paws and grooming himself, Naruto turned his attention back to his objective. Sasuke-bastard was digging dispiritedly into a bowl of cereal, a plate of fruit discarded to the side of him. 'Mah but he looks dead in the mornings. He needs to do something…exciting!'

Right! He knew just what to do. Walking over to Sasuke chair he started sniffing around. Up and down his leg…under the table…He could feel Sasuke's movements stop to watch him. Naruto grinned to himself before jumping up onto the chair across from Sasuke.

"Seriously, get off the furniture. If Sakura comes down…"

Blah, blah. Pink-Alarm was just loud and bright. She wouldn't actually _do_ anything to him much less _dare_ touch him. Naruto's amusement must be on his face because Sasuke stopped as if realizing what he was saying.

"Yeah, yeah. She'd only point and scream. But I'd rather not have to listen to her screaming too much today." 'Well me too but…well, it's for _your_ own good.'

And with that he jumped on the table, grabbed a large section of watermelon in his mouth and ran for it.

"The-FUCK! KITTEN!" 'Really had to get bastard to call him something else too.' Naruto tore into the den, and paused in a corner, shifting the fruit in his teeth. The juice was delicious and kind of distracting him. Sasuke had stalked in after him and only now watching him pause in the doorway, arms spread wide, Naruto realized how ridiculously funny…and sort of cute he looked. Sasuke had a displeased glare on his flushed face and his black hair was in a rat's nest of disarray. The large rumpled black T-shirt he had put on after waking was hanging on his slim frame and his gray sweatpants quite honestly were going to fall from their precarious balance on his hips if Sasuke didn't stop to pull the cinch on them.

Naruto's eyes flared with mirth as he watched Sasuke walk into the room, arms still spread wide and stooping as if he hoped to catch him in a _hug_. Itachi had never been this…stupid? No, that wasn't the word. Gullible? Well, that either. Amusing. Yeah, Itachi had never been so amusing.

Chomping into the watermelon one more time, Naruto made a muffled yelp and ran for it again. Sasuke's lunge caught air.

"KITTEN!!"

'Come on Sasuke-bastard! Let's run. I'm going to start you running!'

* * *

By the time he'd caught Kitten there was a trail of dismembered watermelon all over the first floor of the house. And he had a feeling Kitten had gotten bored with how slow he was as his 'capture' had actually happened right back at the kitchen table where Sasuke found him dropping the destroyed and almost clean rind back in the plate.

Sasuke dropped back into his chair heavily panting and threw an arm over his face. "Itachi sent you here to kill me."

The fox stopped licking his chops and gave him a _look_, similar to the 'You're stupid' look. He couldn't define it.

"I'm not out of shape by the way. You're just faster." The fox grinned then and looking haughtily away, started to groom his fluffy tail. "If I go to the store will you behave? Leave Saukra alone and watch TV or something?"

The fox tilted his head to the side and looked at Sasuke from the corner of his eye. Then gave a barely there nod. Sasuke assumed the hesitation was in the terms of contingency.

"If she bothers you first feel free." The fox gave him a strange look then, almost _knowing_ before nodding again more firmly. "Good." Right. It wouldn't be so bad to have a smart animal in the house. For a few days of course. In fact he should try to call his brother today and see if he was home yet. After he got back.

"Here's some chow for while I'm gone." Sasuke had gotten up to fill the bowl. Water was there from yesterday but he changed it anyway. "Meat and fruit then?" Finally a nod and fanged grin. "And I'm not stupid."

With that, Sasuke headed for the stairs to get ready for the day.

* * *

A/N: After the next chapter is posted I would like to begin adding chapters together. So each 'chapter' will be roughly 2000 words instead of 1000. And some will get even closer to 3000 as sometimes I wrote like 1500+ a chapter. I was going to start doing it this chapter but something rather special happens in the next chapter so I needed it to stand alone. For impact.

Hmm, a riddle this time.

A plane carrying two FBI agents was flying over the Pacific. Suddenly it encountered engine trouble and crashed killing every, single, person, on board. Except the man and the woman sitting behind the FBI agents. Why?


	8. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto…or anything, pretty much.

A/N: #squints suspiciously# Did you guys google the answer? Too many people got that right…lol. Cookies and milk for Moola Deena, Wicked Kit, Ivvy-sama, Stavi.

Kali09…wordplay, it's all in the word play. You got distracted by the FBI agents.

Akuma…I have to ask…what the hell plan!? Was the plane trip a conspiracy?! Lol. Nadramon, glad I introduced you to the cute-ness of chinchillas.

**Because I Love –To Torture- My Brother**

**Chapter Five**

He was walking up and down the aisles of the supermarket, pushing a cart full of meats and fruit. Anyone looking in would think he was on some crazy kind of diet. Salmon cutlets, shrimp, hamburger beef, steak, some sort of white meat fish. And then, kiwi, watermelon, peaches, apples.

That damned fox was so not worth the trouble. Really, it was only because it was the innocent in this situation and happened to belong to Itachi that he would do all this. It had nothing to do with the fact this was the one pet Itachi had left at his house that was entertaining, made him break out of his sorry old routine…that made him laugh. Even at himself. A small smile curled his lips as he walked in thought. Or at Sakura. She was so ridiculous sometimes.

Sasuke was heading to the pet-care section to get a lint brush, he had caught some red hairs in his bed, when someone's cart hit into his coming out of another lane.

"Oh I'm sorry." A soft voice said, as if on automatic. It sent a shiver down his spine. Sasuke knew that voice anywhere. He looked up. "I wasn't paying…" Then the person looked up too.

Neji Hyuuga. Of all the places to run into…

"Sasuke." Jesus. Only Neji said his name like that. All husky. In a way that made his name sound like if he'd just said 'sex' with a tone of expectancy.

"I'm sorry. _I_ wasn't paying attention." Sasuke replied quickly. "Forgive me, my head was elsewhere…"

There was a pause as Neji lowered his head and pulled his cart back, before those unique blue eyes looked up again. "You…You're looking well."

"Yeah?" A light flush climbed up Sasuke neck, making him feel overly warm. "Nothing's changed about me." Shit, was that the wrong thing to say? "You're looking _very_ good." Now _that_ was the wrong thing to say.

Neji blushed then and turned his head to the side. "Ah…" Geez Sasuke. Open mouth, insert foot!? "H-how is…Sakura?"

Sasuke stiffened, and looked down into his cart, unseeing. "She's fine." He didn't see Neji wince at how cold his voice had gone. "Still…nothing on that front. And Father hasn't called recently."

"Okay." Jesus this was awkward. Talking to the ex –you still loved- about the _woman_ you had married –who you could give a flying fig about- not being pregnant yet.

Neji shuffled. "You know, I should get going. I don't want to hold you up…you looked like you're having a barbecue party or something." The brunette male laughed lightly, pointing to Sasuke's cart.

"Neji!" Sasuke strode around the cart quickly and grabbed Neji's arm, pulling him close. "Wait." He lowered his voice and took a deep breath, for courage, and inhaled Neji's scent. "_Jesus_…" Arousal was curling in his gut already. "I've missed you."

"Sasuke…" Neji made a light attempt at pulling his arm away before Sasuke grabbed him more firmly.

"I-I…know, you said we couldn't…continue, if I married Sakura but…Christ Neji. I love _you_! I don't love her…Hell I don't even _like _her." Sasuke lowered his head until he was nuzzling Neji's ear. "Having to try to conceive with her disgusts me…_making love_ should be like…sinking into something you've known what feels like forever…_and hot and slow and_…"

"Sasuke!" Neji pulled away harshly, face red. "I am not…and I refuse to be, anybody's _bit_ on the side."

"But I love you!" God, had he just declared that in a store between cleaning products and air freshener?

"I don't really care!" Neji retorted, then paled and backtracked. "I…I _care_ about you too but I refuse to put myself in that situation." He turned his back, leaving Sasuke to look at his long ponytail. "That you leave me every evening to go home to _fuck her_."

"Twice a month." That was not going to help. Unless it was to wipe away all traces of his earlier arousal.

"_Bullshit! _I don't care if it's once in your lifetime!" Neji turned back around eyes flaring. "If you're with me, _it's me_ and no one else!" Grabbing his cart he gave Sasuke one more hard look. "You cared about your family name and pleasing your father more than you cared about me. Or else you would have told him where to shove it when he told you to marry some girl and have kids with her. Enjoy your choice Sasuke!"

It took all his willpower to not run after him but Sasuke didn't want to further embarrass himself in such a public place. And he was blocked on Neji's phone, no longer welcome to his house and it would be a cold day in Hell before Neji visited his.

Sasuke sighed and pinched his nose, heading for the cashier.

* * *

Sakura, or Pink-Alarm, which Naruto thought was a much more suitable name, had been watching him watch TV since Sasuke had left this morning. Every time he rose from his pillow, just to stretch or change positions, she stiffened and immediately had her feet up on the sofa.

Naruto wanted to laugh at the idiocy of it all. He was considering taunting her in some way when the front door opened and slammed shut again. He got up and trotted into the kitchen, Sakura following hesitantly.

Sasuke's face was averted as he walked in. "Someone put these away." Soft, wet breathing and a loud sniff. "I'm going to bed. I think I caught a chill at the store." Sakura was rustling through the shopping bags, not paying attention to Sasuke as he walked away.

"No wonder. You probably spent too much time next to the freezers. All of this frozen meat…is it all for that fox!? Sasuke?"

Naruto ignored the Pink-Alarm's calls too and trotted up the stairs quickly after Sasuke. He rushed past him into the bedroom just before the door was slammed behind the long legs.

"_Fuck!_" And then what was left of Sasuke broke down, tears coming a little easier behind the shield of his hands. "Neji…"

Naruto's ears lifted at that. That was the guy. Itachi had mentioned that name. Had Sasuke…met him today? Red eyes followed Sasuke's path as he stumbled to the bed, rubbing his face harshly. He sat down at the bottom and pushed his fingers against his eyes.

"Stop fucking crying. Stop _fucking __**crying!**_" Sasuke tugged two fistfuls of his own hair, eyes shut tightly. "I made my choice. I stand by it. It's over. It's done. We're through…" Sasuke took a deep breath, lowered his hands, nodded to himself and then opened his eyes.

Naruto was waiting there. Just sitting, scarlet eyes sympathetic.

"How…" Sasuke let out a broken laugh. "You know, I don't even care Houdini." The name could be worse, Naruto thought as he eased forward. He nudged one of the limp hands on the bed and was rewarded with a hesitant pat. "You are…"

He licked Sasuke's hand with a soft sound. Salty. But worth it. Sasuke sighed and scratched behind his ears.

They stayed like that for a while until Sasuke stood, face calm again. "I'm going to go paint."

And Naruto didn't follow this time.

* * *

A/N: Yes, you all shall absolutely _die _of missing your shorter chapters...#speaks over loud cheering# but from the next one on it's 2000+ words a chappie.

So drink your bubbly quietly so as to not disturb me. Lol.

Updates on me as I lagged there for a month or so...I've submerged myself in like 3 new shows, 2 new fandoms. But...my newest pairing to follow...from the Heroes fandom...I introduce, Sylinder! #there's not e-damn-nough to keep me happy!# Sylar/Mohinder just...overwhelmed me. It's had me in a daze for a fair week and before that Deathnote had me distracted too so yeah. That's the reason for my lag in updating.

Longer chappies mean longer between updates. Not like between the last and this but not like, every other day like I was doing at first. A week or two between say, since doubling up the chappies I've already written only gives me like 5? In storage? And **Warning**...feel for Sasuke wholeheartedly now, you may not like him much later on #grins#


	9. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Naruto…or anything, pretty much.

A/N: Introducing….SUPER LONG CHAPTERS OF DOOOM!!

**Because I Love –To Torture- My Brother**

**Chapter Six**

Itachi wondered how things were going. Kitten had been with Sasuke for three days so far and he wondered if any progress had been made.

He also should have told Sasuke Kitten liked his bath every three days. Without hair dye.

Itachi sighed mentally, he could _not_ call. He had four messages from his brother waiting for him. All last night around the time he 'should' have been home. His machine was filling up quickly from all the unanswered calls from other people but it would lend credibility when Sasuke called to find out his machine was full.

Meaning, _he wasn't home to clear it_.

He was a genius. With a soft smirk Itachi loosened his tie and leaned back in his chair at work. He was curious though…maybe…oh it'd be risky. But worth it.

Itachi took out his international cell phone and dialed his brother.

* * *

His cell phone's chime barely made it over the sound of Rammstein in the basement. Only Houdini's raised head and the ears pointed up told him, yes for sure, that had been his phone.

Sasuke walked away from his easel and wiped his hands carefully, and used the remote to mute the music before walking over. He picked it up and when he saw who was calling, cursed, almost fumbled it and then opened it quickly.

"ITACHI! Where the fuck have you been!?"

"Hello to you too little brother. I didn't know I was so missed." Came the amused voice through the phone. Houdini sat up and huffed, next to Sasuke's leg.

"You left your _fox _at my house!" Sasuke shouted.

"How is Kitten? Tell him I've missed him. Did you give him a bath today? He likes a bath every three days or so." Sasuke took the phone away from his ear to stare at it incredulously. Was his brother F-ing serious?

He put the phone back to his ear slowly. "Look…Itachi? You can bathe him yourself. When are you coming back?"

"Ah…I'm still overseas actually. I'm on the cell. This meeting's taking a while Sasuke. To be honest I might not be back until next week Friday." Today was Thursday. Sasuke scowled.

"I can't believe you're doing this to me…"

"But I bet you're taking wonderful care of Kitten. And Kitten's taking care of you too…" He could almost hear the smirk in his brother's voice.

"Did you teach him to do all this stuff just to drive me insane? He keeps getting into my studio, sleeping in my bed, stealing my damned fruit at breakfast…he's hidden the fucking TV remote!"

"Oh. Well if he's watching TV that means he's bored. You should do more with him. Take him walking. Jogging, whatever. If he's always in your studio that should tell you he wants to spend time with you. And he slept in my bed too."

"He's not a _dog_ Itachi."

"Only dogs are treated like pets Sasuke?" Lord, he made him feel stupid when he used that tone. Sasuke glared at the wall. "Get Kitten a new toy, a ball or something and take him out somewhere to play. It'll get you out of that goddamned house with that…wife of yours there all the time."

Another point of conflict. "Don't start."

"I'm not saying anything more. Just…get out." Itachi's voice was firm. "And otouto, take the fox. Sayonara."

"Hey! Wait…you're going to call me-" Fucking bloody hell! Sasuke yelled at the dial tone and then slammed the phone back down onto the CD stand. "Fucking Itachi!"

The fox who had been watching him the whole time, head cocked, yipped once before settling back down.

Sasuke sighed, still frowning and turned back on the music. He wasn't going to bathe the fox, it kept its self pretty clean on its own. He'd buy the fucking ball and take it out a few times before his brother came back. It was the least he could do.

He had a more pressing job to do. He turned back to canvas he was working on and picked up his charcoal again. "Neji Hyuuga." Yes, he was drawing him again. This time, passionate, angry, walking away…

* * *

He was grateful actually that Sasuke hadn't tried to bathe him. He could do that himself.

Sasuke had spent random times during the day, petting him, like how he had the evening before but this time his hands had been covered in the residue from his charcoal pencils. Naruto _loved_ the scratching behind the ears…but not the charcoal stains on his fur.

"Stupid Sasuke-bastard." His voice was husky from disuse and high pitched as his fox voice but it wasn't as if they were awake to hear him.

Naruto had commandeered the bathroom at one in the morning for the sake of a bath. He felt it was desperately needed.

'I actually got used to the Psycho washing me.' The tan, long-limbed body of a blonde male slipped into the lukewarm water of the tub with a sigh of satisfaction. He had to wash quickly, the water would get cold soon. He picked up a bar of soap that smelled like Sasuke and used it to wash himself efficiently.

He'd have to keep himself clean like this if he planned on using this form often. He would need to, in order to first find Neji Hyuuga's place of residence and then hunt him down and talk to him. Somehow he knew before he even did any of that, he had to change Sasuke.

For some reason or the other he was willing to stay with this Sakura woman, when he obviously loved this other man. Naruto couldn't understand why but he had to make Sasuke see what would truly make him happy.

'Of course, first the bastard needs to realize what _happy_ is.' No one could experience what they didn't comprehend. Naruto dumped some gunk stuff he knew was shampoo into his blonde locks and started scrubbing harshly.

"Mah…" Psycho had set it all up perfectly for him without knowing it. He'd get Sasuke to take him out, get Sasuke to make friends and talk to other people. And behind the scenes he would get this Neji Hyuuga to see Sasuke changing. By the time Sasuke was ready to leave his farce of a life, Neji would be ready to take him back! He dunked his head then lifted, shaking out his hair.

Naruto nodded firmly, a wide grin filling his tan face and making his blue eyes sparkle. Yup! He was going to fix Sasuke-bastard's life. Maybe Psycho's too if he had time…and then he'd trot off happily into the sunset.

* * *

What in God's name had he done to deserve this? What deity hated him enough…?

Enough to have him need to 'try' at Sakura's conception in two days' time and then to have his Father visit him the next morning. Yes, his Father.

It made Sasuke wonder why he wasn't on the trip with Itachi but he guessed his brother had been sent out alone.

Sasuke was trying his best to ignore the two looming deadlines. And considering he usually would be beginning to suffer insomnia at the thought of both the 'conceiving' and the prospect of his father visiting, he decided he must be doing a fairly good job of it. The sight of a few red hairs on the floor of his bathroom made him smile and revise his thought.

He guessed the true thanks would have to go to the fox though. By the time Sasuke went to bed at night he was exhausted. He had bought Houdini, he had renamed the fox, -he just _refused _to call it Kitten- a ball and they went into the nearby neighborhood park twice daily now. Once in the morning after breakfast and their 'steal Sasuke's fruit' routine and once in the afternoon/evening, when Sasuke had finished his work for the day.

The last three days Sasuke would admit, had been key in his life. He was about to finish what he promised would be his last three pieces on Neji today. He would let go. He _had_ to let go. Neji was a man who believed in black and white, right or wrong. And he thought it would be wrong to continue with Sasuke while he was married to Sakura.

In normal circumstances it would be but didn't _his_ warrant some measure of…'bending' of the rules?! His Father…_his whole family!_…had pressured him into this position. Neji didn't-wouldn't accept that there was no love in the relationship, no real 'cheating' going on. He wasn't emotionally attached to Sakura in any way. They passed each other in their own house as if they were wraiths walking the same graveyard together…

_No!_ Why was he rehashing this out in his head again?! No! He was done. Neji was too unbending. And eventually, when it occurred…Sakura conceiving would _break _him. So Neji had to be let go.

Sasuke didn't know he would 'move on'…but he had already started on the process. The three pictures he had started on his last meeting with his former lover were going to be done today. After that, maybe at his next gallery day he'd sell them all. That was in a month or so.

It bore thinking about while berating himself over Neji didn't.

A full head of raven hair thunked lightly against a solid bathroom door. A yelp greeted him on the other side. Sasuke smiled again. Houdini had also helped him make a friend in the park.

Not anyone he was interested in romantically, just a…friend. Sasuke had never realized how, _housebound_, he was. How little contact with the outside world he had, until he had walked into that park two days ago to find what seemed like crowds of people…walking around, chatting in pairs or groups. Or scattered across the gigantic field with animals of all types.

Sasuke hadn't realized how much the hybrid pet business was flourishing until he saw two little girls guiding a miniature cow around, it's tail in a plait. Houdini had immediately been in his element, dragging Sasuke out to that field and sniffing and poking his nose at every animal they passed.

Houdini also apparently had another gift of not only attracting every animal back to him but of catching human eyes as well. He'd met two women who loved him –Houdini not Sasuke- and didn't bother _him_ –Sasuke this time-. Ino had been a tall leggy platinum blonde leading around a giant ball of poodle called Chouji and the other woman, Ten Ten, a brunette with a damned ugly schnauzer called Kakashi. He had met these ladies in passing because Kakashi took an immediate liking to teasing Houdini by popping up all over the place when they played hide and seek and Chouji was Houdini's partner in crime, exposing Kakashi's hiding places.

He had met Shikamaru though, sitting under a tree in the most secluded part of the park playing shougi by himself. A large black dog, who he'd found out was named Asuma after a friend of Shikamaru's who had died, had been lying next to him.

For some reason, as soon as Shikamaru acknowledged them by looking up, Houdini was by his side, head nuzzled under his free hand.

Sasuke had tried to apologize profusely and pulled the fox away but…Shikamaru had smiled, told him it was no problem and asked if he could play. The rest was history.

Another impatient yip came from the other side of the door.

"Houdini. Have some patience. Unless you want me to take you out with my hands all full of charcoal again?" The sounds from behind the door stopped and Sasuke smiled wickedly. Though mind, even though the fox seemed to hate being dirtied with Sasuke's art work…he always somehow got clean the next day.

"Alright. Let's go." Sasuke walked out, grabbed a leash and brand new plain collar from his dresser and followed the loping fox out.

"Sasuke? Are you going out again?" Sakura's voice got him to pause just out of her line of sight, next to her studio's doorway.

He rolled his eyes. "Yes Sakura. It's time to walk Houdini. Did you want something?"

"I'm leaving tonight you know. I've got to go to the recording company to do the tracks. I'll be back…" Sasuke stepped back into the doorway, scowl on his face.

"Yes I know. In two days for…it." His ebony eyes glared. "My father is coming in the next morning so don't be late."

Sakura bristled. "I'm not the one shirking responsibilities to walk around an overgrown vermin!"

"He's not a vermin Sakura. He's a fox. Get it through your thick skull." Tiny fangs gently sunk into his skin and Sasuke looked down at the excited fox tugging on his hand. "Okay, okay."

"You-You're not…thinking of _keeping_ him are you?" Sakura gaped.

Sasuke shrugged. "Who knows. Maybe. But it'll be my choice if I do."

And that, was that.

* * *

A/N: Coming in at a whooping two thousand and one hundred plus words...your update! Let's hear it people! UPDATE! UPDATE! UPDATE! YEAH!!

Now review #grins# PLEASE? And I might let you see my Mylar drabble...go to my profile for details


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